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The Ups and Downs

 It's been a few weeks since I last shared anything...it is has been an incredibly busy few weeks. Getting my classroom ready for the new school year, seeing my boy graduate from Boot Camp...which meant flying.  Flying is another fun activity once you reach a certain weight..... the looks as you walk up the plane to find your seat, secretly using your seatbelt extension so you can buckle up. I am forever thankful and blessed for my husband who was able to read my feelings and help me any way that he could. But I know the looks and I know what they mean when I see them. In fact those looks were put into writing today when I got word from my insurance company about a medication my Dr thought I could try to help with weight loss. It was Ozempic, which is fairly new but has shown good results for weight loss in patients with insulin resistant PCOS (Me)..... My insurance sent me a letter letting me know that because I am "severely morbidly obese due to excess calories" the med
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The Battles

 The last 6 months have been nothing if not stressful. But that is not where my struggle with my weight begins....and it is not what led me to this journey either.  I feel like my battle with my weight has been one that I have had almost my entire life. Each time I start to make progress I hit a wall. Sometimes those walls are self imposed and other times those walls come in the form of other people. I was the girl who appeared older when one wanted to appear older....LOL. Hopefully that particular trait has stopped. I digress..... at 13 I looked 16...you get the picture. I remember a time when I was about 16 and working in a large retail store, I was in a good place health wise and well, I was fitting into clothes in the girls department. That was the same time in my life that I had to file a sexual harrassment complaint against a co worker.....and it was the first time that this attention led to a weight gain. Like most people I gained weight my freshman year in college, and then los

How Did I Get Here?

 I suppose there are a million answers and excuses that I could give about how I reached this point in my life. But it really comes down to a perfect storm of emotional eating, stressful experiences and bad choices. Toss in some pregnancies. financial struggles and bad kness....and BOOM. Here we are.  I know I am not alone. But here I am...41, SUPER overweight ( Think Ursula) struggling with my emotions and outlook on it all.  Not a day goes by where I don't look in the mirror and hate what I see. Sure there are parts I like..my baby blues for instance. But overall, I don't look at myself and think...yep, I can keep looking like this. Of course, that issue comes down to a serious lack of confidence, struggles with seeing past my own criticisms and appreciating what God created.  I love my life. I have a husband that I adore, 3 sons who are literally the best thing that I have ever accomplished. I am surrounded by some of the most amazing friends I have ever had. I have just lan